Ever sit in on a lecture or class and the person speaking sounds like they are talking to themselves? They have totally forgotten it is a 101 class and no one else in the room has had over 15 years of training and education in the subject matter? This a physiological term called the curse of knowledge. Its when you know things that the other person does not and you have forgotten what it’s like to not have this knowledge.
We have all been guilty of this at one point in time. We forget what it is like NOT to have specific information or experiences. After you lose your virginity you forget what an awkward teenager feels like thinking about sex. After you buy a car you forget the bus schedule or synchronizing the end of your day with the last bus. After you graduate from a university your natural question when meeting people becomes, “what school did you go to”? We all do it. We all assume.
And when you become a parent sometimes we forget what being a 3 year old feels like. Or being 4 or 14. We sometimes negate that we were ever children, imagined monsters were under our bed, how it felt to like a girl/boy in our class or that a jolly man in a red suit knew we threw a spit ball in math class last month. Try not to do that.
The Curse of Adulthood or Peter Pan Syndrome as I’d like to call it — means you have forgotten what it feels like to be a kid. Or even worse you don’t try to imagine what it must feel like being a kid nowadays. If your daughter keeps asking you a million questions about animals at the zoo or what you are doing under the hood of the car, tell her! She has no clue or idea about either! If kids ask why they should eat veggies explain what they do to and for your body. I explained to my daughters who Popeye is and why he is singlehandedly responsible for my love of spinach to this day (they thought I was silly).
Your children don’t know and will be curious. Just like you were once. Remember that. It will help with your patience. Promise.
– A Single Dad